• home
• games
• the lists
• rants & raves
• movies
• bands
• downloads

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame - Or Is It?

Is it really the "Rock and Roll" Hall of Fame? What is "Rock and Roll"? And should CyberMonkies even care about genre labels?

This place has been eating at my insides for several years now. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is just another example of Corporate America stealing a significant part of the culture and warping it into a meaningless cash cow, devoid of the true spirit of that which it claims to celebrate. Yes, my monkey brethren, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is just The Hard Rock Café in a fancier building.

Where to begin? How about the museum's building itself? A lovely structure, no doubt, but what the fuck does a clean white angular building fronted by a glass pyramid have to do with Rock and Roll? Why did they pick an architect (I.M. Pei) who, by his own admission, knows nothing about Rock and Roll? I won't bitch about the location . . . even though I think anyone with a brain would agree that Los Angeles, New York City, or Memphis would have made more sense, at least all the little chicks with the crimson lips know Cleveland Rocks.

So, the location is adequate. The building is totally wrong. That brings us to the Inductees. How many paragraphs could I write about that? Don't worry, I promise to keep it brief. The list of inductees defies any logical explanation. Sure, they did the obvious ones . . . The Beatles, Elvis (although I have my own gripes about the so-called "King", not even Magnificent Bastard could argue that he doesn't get in). But where is Deep Purple? The committee obviously feels that Prog doesn't matter - where are Rush and Yes? I could understand waiting so long if the Hall was full of more deserving inductees, but please please please explain to me how Grand Master Flash gets in before Yes? Isn't this the "Rock and Roll" Hall of Fame? Look at the list of inductees - seems to me that we have more R&B and Soul performers than Rock and Roll. I'll even give you some of those . . . granted, R&B and Rock have many things in common, granted they sprang from common roots, and granted, each one influenced the other in the early years . . . but The Staples Singers? The Staples Singers get in when Marc Bolan is still waiting? No love for the Stooges, but Ike Turner deserves an entry? The Jackson 5? And Michael Jackson? Did I miss something somewhere? I can't wait for the day we see if the Backstreet Boys or NSYNC get in first (and we'll still be waiting for Hüsker Dü to get the credit they deserve.

But working on this article did make me think about some things. What is Rock and Roll? Where are the boundaries? Most importantly, how much should we care about genre labels. The answer, from the Monkey Elders, is that we shouldn't. Labels, even the all-mighty "Rock" label, really are ways to divide us, to separate us, and to limit what we listen to. I know people who refuse to listen to Rap, not because they don't like it (they haven't listened to enough of it to know any better), but because it isn't Rock, or Metal, or what have you. And that's just wrong. It's not about the labels, it's not about the names, it's about the music. Wu-Tang rocks, and Stevie Ray has soul. But if Stevie Ray doesn't get in on his first year of eligibility, I'm gonna declare a Monkey Fatwa!

Ultimately, what's wrong with the Rock and Roll of Fame is what we started with - and what real Rock and Roll, however you classify that, has always had to fight - Corporate Greed. Jann Wenner, of "Rolling Stone" magazine infamy, and his friends in the corrupt and profit driven record industry, are the real criminals in this entire debacle. The nominations are often driven more by whose induction will sell more tickets to the dinner than actual merit. And of course, since the record labels and corporations are big contributors, you know that's playing a part in all of it . . . who's induction will sell more records? And I think all true CyberMonkeys can agree on one thing . . . THAT isn't Rock and Roll.

So, I'm sitting in the Lair this morning, reading some feedback. Sometimes, it's all I can do not to screech at the top of my lungs and fling pooh at the crap in the Inbox (I know, redundant), but every once in awhile it's all worth it, and that's what ya'll get to see (yeah, I said ya'll . . . what, you think CyberMonkeys can't have an accent?). But today, I received some feedback that's worthy of special treatment.

Now, some of you might think this is getting special treatment because it's written by a "Rock Star" . . . but you should really know better. CyberMonkeys aren't impressed by such things. If the almighty Lemmy himself sent me feedback and it sucked, I'd fling pooh at it (of course, Lemmy would never do that, but you get my point). This is just a lesson for all who wish to ascend to the lofty halls of CyberMonk-dem in what good feedback should be.


"So the r&r hall of fame thing...I agree with all of it, but the part of the whole "hall" thing that baffles me is how seriously everyone takes it. ESPECIALLY the people who get inducted...they all say how great a milestone it is and blah blah blah...it's not sports, you can't judge success the same way....rock and roll is supposed to be the rebellious angry bad guy, how can you put on suits and ties and have this polished up joint and have it be apropriate for the spirit of rock? Jerry Lee Lewis married his 13 year old cousin! These are the roots of rock and roll. Robert Johnson was poisoned by a jealous husband. Elvis was all but banned in adult life. Maybe in a kitch-y sort of way, sure - rock and roll has always featured the poor man's version of debonair - but to legitimize all this upper class crap in the pantheon of rock, and then judge who deserves to be in this place and who doesn't is stupid. Soon it's going to be in acts' label deals..."if you make it to the hall, that's two more points on the album for you".
Fuck 'em. "



Now that's how you do it!
Check out Dave's tunes at his website . . . he's good!

The fault lies in the hands of the people who profit on the weak minds of impressionable idiots who buy an album worth of crap for one mediocre, over played song they've been programmed to like.
The music industry is corrupt and rock and roll has been exploited and used up like a nickel a minute cum dumpster.